2013 coming soon!

Hi everyone,

 

So it's right in the middle of the holidays! I just have half of my vacation left. So I've been working on my school assignment so far. I've been able to contact my partner and we finally met to work on it. So we met at school on thursday and let me tell you something. It was a real pain in the ass just to get there. I didn't know there was a snowstorm. So when I left the house, I had snow up to my knees. I am serious! It's been a while we didn't have much snow. So I waited for an extra 15 minutes outside in the snowstorm for the bus because it was late. =_= Anywyas, i got to school and we worked on our assignment. To be honest, it was a huge disappointment. I talked to my school partner before the final exams and we promised that we would review our classnotes, do exercises,...do whatever is neeed so when we meet, we can start working on it right away. As a result, he didn't do anything much on his part. So we spent 2 hours explaining him what it was all about. Sigh! There was some stuff I was unsure about so I asked him for his opinion. He didn't seem to worry or even care about all of this. T.T On my way home, the snowstorm has caused so much traffic that 90% of the busses were canceled. that being said, the bus I was supposed to take was one of them. It was overall a bad day.

 

So my holidays were mostly school related. Despite all the bad things that hapenned, I was so lucky yesterday that another classmate of mine helped me getting in contact with someone who's also doing the same assignment. I was able to ask some questions and make clarifications. At least, we are going in the right direction.  So I am going to meet my partner again tomorrow and hopefully we can finish it off and wrap it up so I can finally spent the rest of my vacation carefree.

 

I doubt I will have time to write again before 2013. So I want to take this opportunity to wish all of you a happy new year! Year 2012 is terrible but 2013 will be a fresh start when everything will turn out for the better. So take care everyonne and I'll write to you guys soon! :D

Merry Christmas!!!

Hi everyone,

So it was christmas! What hapenned lately? I finished my exams not long ago and I have one more school assignment to work. It has to be handed in before January 6th. I briefly examined everything and it seems very long to do. Urgh! I can't wait for all of this to finish. So I planned to work on it today...well I meant few hours back on christmas day. It super sucks because it's the holidays and I can't enjoy it fully. It's a blasphemy! I really didn't want to miss out this year's christmas because only the people I truly cared were there. But anyway, I decided to bring my laptop to work on my school stuff there. So what hapenned? My laptop ended collecting dust at the end. I stuffed myself with food, had nice conversations with my family, had gift exchange, and stuffed myself again. Now that I looked back, I kind of want to cry because this assignment is making me nervous. =_= But I had a nice evening so there's no regret. It's only once a year right? :D

So starting tomorrow, I have to bust my booty nd figure out what I have to do with this assignment. Then the work will truly begin when I will meet my partner this thursday. I just hope he will reply me back and that he won't have a hangover. It's new year's in less than a week. I wonder if you guys are excited but I am! I truly am! Year 2013 will be a fresh start for me and it will end all my school misery. I mean, year 2012 has been bad on so many levels it's beyond belief. The school strike, the pressure of school work (which is more than usual due to the strike), the break up, the crush who kindly asked me to scram off, and now some more pressure on school! Bring it all on! I will take it all! :P Year 2013 will be rewarding I can feel it! :D

Anyways, I will keep this post short! I must read my classnotes. =_= Merry late christmas! :)

Ho Ho Ho! XD

Hi everyone,

 

How are you people doing? This is the first time I slept so much. The week has been hectic. So Let's see! I had my exam last wednesday evening and then I spent the whole night studying for my exam on thursday. So yeah! I stayed up for more than 24 hours. You thought that my misery has finally ended. Well you are wrong! I had to do christmas shopping with my mom right after my exam. I was really tired. That gift was actually for an exchange gift for X-Mas. So we went to this store and we found nothing interesting. We hoped in another one but still nothing. So at the end, we walked in circle. I looked at my watch and it was 8pm. Remember: I didn't sleep at all. After window shopping for another 20 minutes, we finally found a store that has something nice. When we finally decided on what to buy, we waited in the line but damn it was long. Obviously, everyone seems to be shopping for gifts in last minute. But come on! They had like a month before hand to do it while I was busy with school. So we waited for another 15 minutes and we finally headed home. I was so tired that I fell asleep in the car.

 

It was 9pm once i got home and the first thing I did was sleeping. I somehow woke up around midnight and I was like 'Crap!' I must get up to work on my report. So there I was in front of my computerworking on my school report until 4am. Actually, I was working on Excel. It was long but I did a lot. So I went back to sleep and woke up at 11am to go to school for my school assignment with my team. So I got to school yesterday and worked on my homework again. You guys won't believe what hapenned. I worked really hard from 1pm to 7pm. I saved the file and closed excel. So I inserted my usb key into the computer and went to the desktop. Shock! Where is the file? I looked everywhere in the school computer but found nothing. A work of 6 hours has vanished! I couldn't describe how I felt. I think my brain went blank for a moment. Was I crying? Was I laughing? You people won't even know the difference. @_@ I really wanted to throw the chair at the computer. What could I do? Either i really cry or throw the chair at it, it wouldn't change anything. All I could do is to get a grip of myself. I met with Sue after that for a supper at Kazu! I will write about this restaurant in the next few posts once I get the pitures Sue took.

 

Once I got home, I stayed up until 3am to redo the work that has been lost. Then I slept until 1pm today. Oh yeah baby! I have been rewarded with a good night sleep! XD So I'm going to be out again tonight. I just hope I won't have other bad luck. The work I lost is just a huge blow. I wasted 6 hours of my life. =_= What is this? Some kind of Post apocalyptic X-Mas?

 

Anyways, I will be back on regular blogging now since I am done with my exams. So goodluck with gift shopping if it's not done yet. XD Enjoy the holidays!

Depression during the holidays! D:

Hi everyone,

Sorry I haven't write anything lately. I have two more exams this coming week and I sort of maintained my discipline for studying. So today I almost cracked. It's the first time in 7 years I did a 12hours studying marathon. Sue told me that when she was almost graduating, she was so fed up with school that she did almost whatever that has to be done. It's like you are so sick of doing something that you just mash it up just to get rid of it. Unfortunately, it's the total opposite for me. I've been studying my booty off because i do not want to repeat any courses! @_@ Well Sue was born a genius when I'm toclumsy who gets tutored. :P I just can't wait to go eat with Melly, shopping with Sue, and eat ice cream.

So that's the quick update about what I did so far this week. I want to bring a very subtle subject which is depression. I talked with a friend today and she is in deep depression. It's a very difficult to deal with this problem because it's not something that a doctor can fix. It can get serious if not addressed quickly. I'm going to be honest here. I've been depressed before. I've been unhappy with things that didn't go my way or simply you have lost the appetite of life. At a certain point in our life, we ask ourself "Why do we live?" and "What's the point to live knowing that we will die anyway?". Sometimes, we are stressed about things that is out of control like work. We were so carefree when we were children. We didn't have to think about anything. I had naps in kindergarden and snacks. That's real life. Nothing to worry about. Little did we know that problems were waiting patiently waiting for us one by one, no rush: love, school, money, work, marriage, sexual orientation, family, friends, insecurities, car, sex life, and the list goes on. Everyone go through that. Even celebreties, even the hottest guy, and even teh most beautiful girl in the world. You think britney Spears had it all happy? Even Megan Fox, which I think gorgeous, has depression and anxiety. It's kind of obvious because there are so many hate comments on youtube or other websites. The way I see it is a form of bully. So you get it now right? Even celebreties are bullied about us commoners. We all have insecurities and we all are unsure about a certain thing in life. But in reality, life is actually pretty simple. You are the one who makes it complicated. Trust in me when I say that. I had a very difficult childhood and I had to endure terrible things just to keep my family together. I'm not going to go deep in details but I'm sure that we all have a story to tell. It's ok to cry and pause for a moment to pull ourselves together. But locking yourself up for more than a month is not going to be any good for you. Even if I was to shower someone in depression with nice words and uplifting cheers it would not work. We create our own fear. We think to much. We analyze to much. We take to much seriously the critisms given to us.

When I was young, someone regularly came to hurt me. It was a nightmare. I endured it for years. In my mind, I was crying for help. But nobody came for me. When that person came over our house, I was trembling already. I had no one who got my back. I was on my own. One day, I just had enough and I fought back. I was young, I didn't have strenght but it's ok. I tried and it worked. I felt good about it. I felt like I got my life back in control. Listen girls and boys. If anyone hurts you physically or in any type of abuse, you have to fight back and let other people know to help you. You have to stand up and claim your right as a human beings. Don't sit in the corner of your room and poison your life away. You get bully at school? Do something about it! Hey! I got surrounded once by 4 boys once and I showed no mercy.

Some people go into drugs and alcohol to 'forget' their problems. They would even hurt themselves. It is that bad. You can't let that happen. The problem we have is that people might give up easily. Here's the sad thing about today's society. All people think is 'time is money'. People aren't walking but they run. The light is red but they don't give a damn and they still cross the streets. There's no time for helping others and there's no time to mourn. You weep alone in the streets thinking that someone might come to help when you need it the most. You're dreaming. They will just walk pass by you. You go live a life of filth with drugs and alcohol means you are turning your back on anything that doesn't suit you. You think there's a charming prince coming to rescue you? No. Nobody's going to help you out there. You don't wanna die? You move your own goddamn feet. That's right. That's how I saved myself.

Oh good lord! I must go back to study now...and it's already 3am. @_@ Anyways, i always get carried away...now look at this post! It's long. -_- Anyway, i hope you enjoy reading my random stuff and take care. :D

Rushing hour....for X-Mas shopping

Dears friends,

I'm sorry if I haven't contacted you guys and girls but I'm am extremely overloaded. Sigh! =_= So I have my first final next week and two more the following week. So my last exam is on the 20th of December. Then, I have this school assignment, a tedious one, which must be submitted before December 23th. What a bliss! *please note the sarcasm* Like it wasn't enough, I have another assignment due on the sixth of January. Then what? I begin school on January 7th. Urgh! My holidays will be ruined. At least I have a partner to do the work...but still. I want to spend X-Mas eating good food and not worrying about a single thing. That's when you just want to shut your brain off for some rest but I think it won't be my case. Just think about it. I'll just have 1 day to buy X-Mas gifts.

Talking about X-Max, I hate shopping for gifts. I truly hate it. =-= I have no trouble buying stuff for myself because i kow what I like. but when it's for someone else, I am always wonder 'Is it a great gift?', 'is she/he will like it?'. Many told me it's the good intention that counts so they are happy with whatever they get. Really? I would hate to hear that my gift I gave you last year ends up collecting dust in the corner of your bedroom. It's the worst thing that can happen. You never know! That person might be saying 'Oh yeah! I love it! Thanks!' But it really ends up somewhere in the basement. So what I do, I buy stuff that I like for other people. If I don't like it, don't expect someone else to like it either.

There's a little problem though. $_$ All the stuff I like are costly. 'Oh this is nice!' *checks price ....Stands in shock, and puts it back* I don't mind buying expensive gifts to friends and family. It's just that i am limited because of my current status. Well, I'm still a student and jobless. @_@ So I just can't wait to graduate. It kind of sucks but without money, you are really limited to almost everything. When I complain about school, my mom would tell me that it's not hard. Working like her is way harder. I didn't understand back then but now everything comes to sense. When you graduate, you have a chance to sit down in your office and go back home when it's 5pm when people like my mom earn peanuts to make a living working days and nights.

Back to X-Mas gifts! Girls are pretty easy when it comes to gifts. Here is my list of stuff I love:

-box of chocolate
-mechanical pencil (I strangely have an obsession to it...I feel like a boss or superior when I have a comfortable pencil to write with :P The one I am currently using costed 10$...but it feels nice and I feel like i can own any exams with it)
-jewelries (I can be really picky though. Don't buy me a huge white watch or a hello kitty pendant...lol..no)
-pastries =)
-set of hand cream or soap..you know...those that comes gift in packages. (it looks so pretty*_*)
-manicure/edicure set (anything related to nails)
....and the list goes on.

I know it sounds silly but I'm attracted to anything that looks nice and pretty. :D Alright! Enough for today! So have a great weekend! bye :)

Breaks up!

Hi everyone,

 

I've been kind of distracted lately. My final exams will begin next week and guess what I did last weekend. I planned to study but things didn't turn out the way I wanted. My aunt came over and all we did was shopping! @_@ So she came on saturday with a special guest so I had to be their guide at the mall. The mall closes at 5pm anyways so I could have studied when we got back. However, we ended up eating to a buffet instead. @_@ So when we came back, my stomach was so full and heavy that I fell on my bed. XD The same goes for my aunt so she decided to sleep over and do more shopping the next day with the family. =_= I'm so screwed. Not only I haven't studied but I gained weight from the buffet. lol Oh well! It's once in a while. I still have plenty of time to catch up with my books if I get motivated. I got my tip to lose weight so it won't be a problem. :)

 

So it has been a while now since the horrible event hapenned...7 months already? What event am I talking about? The break up of course. So I dated this guy for 9 years. I had dreams, ambitions like children, buying a house,...until the fairy tale ended. So I will share my experience and how I dealt with the situation in order to sort of help anyone of you who are going through this.

Week 1
The first day was the apocalypse. It was the afternoon and I met Sue at downtown. I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to go home yet with my face all read and wet from tears. I was simply in disbelief and I told myself that everything will be fine in the next few hours. There must be a mistake. So the first week, it was hell. I sort of isolated myself in my room and wanted to be alone. I cried every night thinking about the past and how to solve the problems or to get the relationship fixed. Everyone in my household was sick worried. I couldn't eat or drink anything. I just didn't have the appetite and every time I tried to swallow food, it was somehow stuck in my throat. I really felt miserable. I thought I would never be happy again. How am I going to overcome this? Am I going to be ok? How will my future turn out? I was thinking and crying all the time.

Week 2
Reality hitted really hard on me like a slap the face. There are things which are totally broken and can't be fixed. That's when I realized that I should stop crying. While you are weeping your tears, your ex is having a good time. So why would you regret the past when others don't even care? The first person who took me out was Sona when I wasdone being a hermit. Few days later, I met up with Melissa and Nixon. It was still painful but my friends kept me distracted. Like it or not, I tried to smile although I wanted to cry. I ate normally but not as a glutton when I was with my ex. -_- So I ended up losing 8 pounds.

Week 3
It wasn't that bad anymore. I watched dramas to keep myself busy and I would go out a lot. The key was to always do something. As soon as I end up doing nothing, I think again. So when my friends were busy, I pulled out my old Final Fantasy 8 game. I still cried but less. I had some nightmares now and then. I avoided picking up my ex's calls.

Week 4
Love. Huh? Say what? Oh yeah you heard me! :D I fell in love with someone else. Alright...it was just a crush. Dates? Maybe. However it only lasted for a short time. Yes it was short but it was real. It didn't work out but it did make me smile because it shows there's hope.

Summary
I think I finally got over it at 100% after a month or so. Are there any feelings left? Nope! The only thing that remained was nostalgia. I can't forget the 9 years of relationship. There are some good memories that I can't forget and the laughs we had. I remember when we were in high school. I would call it the 'good old days'. Do I still keep contact with him? I'm not going to lie. Yes I do. We do call each other on a monthly basis or less just to get an update on each other. I know some of you would be thinking 'Gloria! How can you still be nice with him after all he did to you?'. Well I guess it all comes down to each individual. Everyone deals a break up differently. I'm so happy that I was able to overcome this nightmare after a month. If I break up with a guy because it just didn't click, we could still hang out. If I break up with him because he cheated/liked someone else but told me, I would definitely want to break his jaw but we can still keep in touch. If this guy cheats on me, hides it from me, and I learn it from someone else then I would gladly give him the middle finger if he wants to keep in touch with me.

What is important is to not neglect yourself. It doesn't matter how long you've been with your ex. Cry all you need for 2 or 3 weeks but no more. Just think abou it! Life is to short to be wasted on poisoning your life away by crying in the corner of your bedroom. People say time heals. I sort of disagree with it. It all depends on yourself. If you are motivated to move on, you will be able to do it. You must remained happy, positive, and patient. Don't be discouraged! It's not the end but a new beginning instead. Of course it hurts like a b*tch for the first few weeks but you will somehow appreciate your new freedom. You will go out with your friends, meet new people, and you will fall in love again I assure you. Love in just around the corner. So don't resent life. Guys can be jack*sses sometimes but there are exceptions. There are guys who can be truly loyal and spend the rest of his life with you. It does exist. Don't tire yourself looking everywhere  because it will come to you. Just let it happen. The same goes for girls to. There are many of them who can't be faithful like there are women who are truly devoted.

Now just think about it this way. Why do people who live in countries where their homes are in the verge of destruction are still holding up to life? They have lost their homes, family members, and loved ones. Why keep on living when there's nothing to eat? There's no rain and no farmable land in some countries but only desert. Why do they live knowing they will die? Because they believe in miracles! Miracles do happen IF you believe in them and do something about it. So if you spend the rest of your life mourning or sulking down, nothing will happen.

Am I happy again? Yes. Will I find love again? I hope so. ^-^ Do I still feel sad? No more. So I hope it will help some of you if anyone is dealing with such situation. Just remember that in order to know happiness you must know pain. I'm going to study some more now. -_- So I hope you enjoyed the post! Take care and have a nice week! :D

 This guy truly believes in miracle..i can feel it :D : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W86jlvrG54o&feature=g-hist