Hi everyone,
Sorry I haven't write anything lately. I have two more exams this coming week and I sort of maintained my discipline for studying. So today I almost cracked. It's the first time in 7 years I did a 12hours studying marathon. Sue told me that when she was almost graduating, she was so fed up with school that she did almost whatever that has to be done. It's like you are so sick of doing something that you just mash it up just to get rid of it. Unfortunately, it's the total opposite for me. I've been studying my booty off because i do not want to repeat any courses! @_@ Well Sue was born a genius when I'm toclumsy who gets tutored. :P I just can't wait to go eat with Melly, shopping with Sue, and eat ice cream.
So that's the quick update about what I did so far this week. I want to bring a very subtle subject which is depression. I talked with a friend today and she is in deep depression. It's a very difficult to deal with this problem because it's not something that a doctor can fix. It can get serious if not addressed quickly. I'm going to be honest here. I've been depressed before. I've been unhappy with things that didn't go my way or simply you have lost the appetite of life. At a certain point in our life, we ask ourself "Why do we live?" and "What's the point to live knowing that we will die anyway?". Sometimes, we are stressed about things that is out of control like work. We were so carefree when we were children. We didn't have to think about anything. I had naps in kindergarden and snacks. That's real life. Nothing to worry about. Little did we know that problems were waiting patiently waiting for us one by one, no rush: love, school, money, work, marriage, sexual orientation, family, friends, insecurities, car, sex life, and the list goes on. Everyone go through that. Even celebreties, even the hottest guy, and even teh most beautiful girl in the world. You think britney Spears had it all happy? Even Megan Fox, which I think gorgeous, has depression and anxiety. It's kind of obvious because there are so many hate comments on youtube or other websites. The way I see it is a form of bully. So you get it now right? Even celebreties are bullied about us commoners. We all have insecurities and we all are unsure about a certain thing in life. But in reality, life is actually pretty simple. You are the one who makes it complicated. Trust in me when I say that. I had a very difficult childhood and I had to endure terrible things just to keep my family together. I'm not going to go deep in details but I'm sure that we all have a story to tell. It's ok to cry and pause for a moment to pull ourselves together. But locking yourself up for more than a month is not going to be any good for you. Even if I was to shower someone in depression with nice words and uplifting cheers it would not work. We create our own fear. We think to much. We analyze to much. We take to much seriously the critisms given to us.
When I was young, someone regularly came to hurt me. It was a nightmare. I endured it for years. In my mind, I was crying for help. But nobody came for me. When that person came over our house, I was trembling already. I had no one who got my back. I was on my own. One day, I just had enough and I fought back. I was young, I didn't have strenght but it's ok. I tried and it worked. I felt good about it. I felt like I got my life back in control. Listen girls and boys. If anyone hurts you physically or in any type of abuse, you have to fight back and let other people know to help you. You have to stand up and claim your right as a human beings. Don't sit in the corner of your room and poison your life away. You get bully at school? Do something about it! Hey! I got surrounded once by 4 boys once and I showed no mercy.
Some people go into drugs and alcohol to 'forget' their problems. They would even hurt themselves. It is that bad. You can't let that happen. The problem we have is that people might give up easily. Here's the sad thing about today's society. All people think is 'time is money'. People aren't walking but they run. The light is red but they don't give a damn and they still cross the streets. There's no time for helping others and there's no time to mourn. You weep alone in the streets thinking that someone might come to help when you need it the most. You're dreaming. They will just walk pass by you. You go live a life of filth with drugs and alcohol means you are turning your back on anything that doesn't suit you. You think there's a charming prince coming to rescue you? No. Nobody's going to help you out there. You don't wanna die? You move your own goddamn feet. That's right. That's how I saved myself.
Oh good lord! I must go back to study now...and it's already 3am. @_@ Anyways, i always get carried away...now look at this post! It's long. -_- Anyway, i hope you enjoy reading my random stuff and take care. :D
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